11/30/18

Reconnection . . . one simply has to wonder
what it's all about. Is is magical? Is it pre-
ordained? Happenstance? Important? A gal
from my high school got in touch with me on
FB thanks to a couple of friends that we have
in common. She said she knew me but I didn't
remember her. Frankly, there are a lot of years
between 15 and 69 and I most likely don't recall
a lot of people and events from that era. Long
story short, I invited her to lunch. Even when
she walked in, I didn't recognize her. Then we
opened the yearbooks . . . and there she was,
our pictures side by side; I recalled her perfectly.
Bottom line, life is fascinating, strange, alluring
in all its aspects. We spent a lovely day together,
many memories, recollections and tales out of
school, as it were; most fun! Life is like that, isn't
it? You go along each day, minding your own
business and doing the best you can. And then,
something happens and you're cast back into a
sea of memories long misplaced and dusty. Almost
magical! Tish, bless you for the reminiscings . . .

wanna take a ride
a trip down memory lane
unlikely travels

11/29/18

It's all fair in love and Walmart! We had
to stop by yesterday to cash a check for
number one lover. As the young man
behind the cash register counted out his
money, the lad remarked, "Oh look, a ten;
I didn't know we had any tens." Coming
directly back to the car, my guy pulls out
his cash, recounts it, and guess what?
NO TEN SPOT! After the initial outrage,
he commented, "I've never before been
conned so slick!" On a larger scale of
sorrow, we heard on early morning news
today that a young man in a local park
was found shooting, sadly ending up as
a suicide by cop. As December approaches
with its glitz, parties and celebrations, we
tend to forget the sadness behind the bright
lights. For every child receiving a sack
load of Santa pressies, yet another doesn't
know where the next meal is coming from.
There are families going through their own
private hell in order to make a special holiday
for their children. Others, out of despair,
resort to petty theft or worse. And, not to
forget the CARAVAN, fighting cold, hunger
and exhaustion . . . no matter personal points
of view. Obviously, none of us are Mother
Teresa, but let's open our hearts and minds
to be ever vigilant, careful and thoughtful,
and as giving as we possibly can. Perhaps
it would be much better to celebrate half
and gift the rest. After all, our coffers and
larders are full, yet 'tis not so for many
others. Here's me wishing all of us amazing
holidays and open arms and hearts!

sadness and glories
pray grant me many merries
can't hack the sorrows

22/28/18

The perfect date . . . I hark back to the days of yore
and think about the dating game. Being 69 years of
age, I suppose my ideas of dating back then would
be very different than what young people today
would believe to be perfection. I can recall going
to the A and W Root Beer stand for a float and
thinking that was rather fun. Although I didn't like
root beer, I think it was the idea of it that I liked. I
loved indoor rollerskating, outdoor picnics, long
walks and short hikes, window shopping and ice
cream cones, as well as NOT walking dogs in the
park. There is something my man and I much
rather relish now; we like to sit by the fire with
a bit of low mood music in the background . . .
(we especially like a thunderstorm) . . . and a
bottle of red between us. If it's early, we are both
fond of tea, and frankly, 'tis hard to tear ourselves
away. I imagine, the magic of the fire is hard to
beat! I do know I can be antsy, upset, even
depressed, and a couple of hours by the fire, and
it's all good. Forget therapy, just give me a few
sticks and a match . . . well, I suppose the wine
helps as well. Wanna date?

baby light my fire
magic waiting to happen
do come sit with me

11/27/18

I have always appreciated my kids, make no mistake!
But, perhaps because of the holidays of late, I've had
this opportunity to sit back and enjoy them in their
various roles as parents, guests, chefs and friends. I
watched my daughter preparing amazing foods, utterly
at home amongst all the brouhaha that goes on at
familial gatherings. My thoughts ran along the lines of
"Oh my God, we actually brought these incredible people
into the world!" I swear, I even had this aha moment
as Michelangelo's Creation of Adam popped into my
head . . . "Oh, so this is what God must have felt like."
I was similarly moved last night when we had supper
with my son. We sat in the kitchen over a glass of wine
as he prepared this amazing soup from scratch. It was
a bit like being in a 3-D movie . . . surrealistic! I was
so moved, I kept tearing up! What a gift our children
are! Somehow, I need to write a thank you letter to
God! . . . and Don Luis Ferreira . . . we done good!!!

bright blessings ahoy
overwhelmed with gratitude
must pay the piper

11/26/18

Freud notwithstanding, have you ever wondered
where your dreams come from? I'm no Freudian
Psychologist, but I've been having some doozies.
Obviously, there are, too much beer at the game
dreams, ate too much at Thanksgiving dreams,
had a fight with my lover dreams, and not to
forget, haven't been laid in ages dreams. And, I
imagine we could add in the nightmares. Not sure
I can pay all the bills this month nightmares, So
wish I hadn't said that nightmares, will she ever
speak to me again nightmares, as well as, I thought
I had gotten over that when I was a kid nightmares.
I've been having such horrific nightmares of late
that if Freud were alive today, I'd be making an
appointment. Yes, I know you're not supposed to
have a heavy meal before bedtime, I understand
you're not to have more than one drink (alright,
maybe two) before going to bed, and I get that
you're supposed to have a clear conscience . . .
although I'm not sure if that is supposed to give
you a good night's rest or be insurance against
hell if you die in the night! Whatever! Tonight,
I'm going to forego supper, lose the proverbial
glass of wine, say my prayers and hope for the
best. I'm exhausted and I need some sleep.

i am begging you
now i lay me down to sleep
pray give me good rest

11/25/18

Who am I? What am I? Where am I going?
Have I lived a worthwhile life? Am I worthy?
Do I measure up? Have I even earned the
right to hope for whatever happens next?
Near the end of our sojourn here on earth,
I imagine these to be the questions we will
ask ourselves. For my part, I don't wish to
wait that long . . . It may be scary as hell,
but I need to hold myself accountable now.
I want to know the truth whatever that may
be and at whatever cost. Perhaps it simply
trickles down to, "Who do I want to be when
I grow up?" I used to worry about what others
thought of me; now, I am mostly concerned
about what I think of me . . . a true turnabout!
Leaving the ethereal aside, "Where do I go from
here?" Is it a question of facing each day anew?
Making well thought out choices? Examining
each action before even happening and aligning
those actions with my own personal philosophy?
Am I touting Shakespeare now? "To thine own
self be true?" Do all and sundry face this agony
with age? What now? Perhaps I should embrace
all this new age ideology. Is it really that easy?
Create myself through thought and self-acceptance?
Maybe easy isn't quite the right word, but whatever
it is, wherever I go from here, I am no longer an
innocent abroad . . . I now live in the realm of
been there, done that; I have to take responsibility
for me, even if this requires growing up at seventy.
Frankly, I am tired just thinking about it; may the
gods grant me courage . . .

longing for answers
dont even know the questions
will there be a test

11/24/18

To my children from another mother . . . I am
missing you! In this modern world in which we
live, a world in which one is often married more
than once, there are children . . . wondrous, sweet
children. They steal your heart and little by little
they become yours . . . not yours entirely because
they belong to another mother. Nonetheless, they
are somehow born of your soul. You have to learn
to let go as they grow up, go away to college, fall
in love and create families of their own. You have
to learn to let go because this is life, a very, very
busy life and the absence of enough time steals
them away. I suspect holidays brings this missing
a bit more to the forefront. So, know that I love
you, my children from another mother. May the
gods hold you close until I can embrace you again.

sometimes my heart aches
finding myself missing you
memories comfort

11/23/18

My fetish might just be keeping my space fairly
organized 'mongst this whole moving trauma.
I can even hear my mother nagging me from the
beyond, "You need to get your desk cleaned off
and your documents filed." So, I finally give in.
Trudging over to the library where my office is,
carrying all these papers, I catch myself muttering
under my breath, almost grumpy teenager style.
It's freezing out there so I turn up the heater, but
I know I'll be finished before it ever warms up.
However, I actually start to warm to the task as
I get into it. As I file, I'm able to put some things
through the shredder, and even though I don't
like filing, I content myself with the fact that come
tax time, I'll be glad I did it. I'm about three or
four papers away from finished when I spy a bill,
a $50.00 bill!!! Unbelievable! I haven't seen a
$50.00 in so many years I thought the banks had
canceled their printing! Where the hell did it
come from? Do you think my mother found a
way to reward me for getting my chores done?
I'm halfway between the awe of the find and the
chagrin I feel, when I look up and say, "Thanks,
mom!" The adult me knows this is impossible,
yet . . . perhaps stranger things have happened.

grinch that i may be
tis a day for miracles
yes i am thankful

11/22/18 - Thanksgiving

Only yesterday we were celebrating Halloween;
today we'll do Thanksgiving and nigh onto tomorrow,
it'll be Christmas. I find all these celebrations a tad
exhausting, yet exhilarating. Such fun! Such family!!
Such joy!!! I know it was only a few days ago that I
wrote something about holidays so this has been
preying on my mind. Holiday exhaustion aside, I've
been wondering how we could incorporate more of
this into our lives rather than less. There simply has
to be a way to bring in more jubilation into our daily
scene rather than the mundane . . . or should it be,
spicing up the mundane to make it more celebratory?
Isn't it champagne that makes orange juice brunch
rather than breakfast?! I think we can apply this
principle even sans champagne! A love note in the
sack lunch, perhaps? Supper a the dinner table
rather than in front of the TV? Invite a girlfriend to
lunch . . . let's picnic at the weekend? I imagine if
we all gave it some thought, even shared our ideas,
we could come up with a plethora of scenarios. I
think I'm going to do an after the TG blues surprise
picnic in bed for my guy . . . could be fun?! Who
knows what I might come up with for dessert!

lets spice up our days
a lot of play and no work
sounds like the ticket

11/21/18

I had been thinking of the written word when this old
adage popped up, "Reading gives us someplace to go
when we have to stay where we are." ~Mason Cooley
Cooley, known for his aphorisms, said it all when he
came out with this one! I've often thought that the
greatest gift my parents gave me after the gift of life,
was the gift of reading. The hours I have spent in the
joys of tumbled thoughts and glorious travels are, to
this day, beyond priceless. I suppose now would be an
appropriate time to confess to book hoarding . . . I even
have my own library, thousands and thousands of
books. Yesterday, i was compelled to take a truckload
of books to the DAV as there was simply no space in
which to house them; this cabin is ever so tiny . . .
I wept copiously! I bet when Jesus said it was more
blessed to give than to receive, he wasn't talking about
books! So, today is one of those perfect days to stay
abed under the comforter and read until twilight! A
fantasy at best . . . alas, Thanksgiving prep awaits!

clearly most thankful
but would rather be reading
family beckons

11/20/18

"I want to be a hater when I grow up!" said no child
ever! Nonetheless, hate, loathing, spite, negativity
are everywhere you look. Truly, I doubt very much
that any of us start out trying to be haters . . . but,
"I hate okra! I can't stand that witch next door!! I
loathe politicians!!! . . . are part of our daily rhetoric.
Nor is it necessary to be a Pollyanna. Indeed, we are
surrounded by a plethora of negativity. How can we
help but hate the horrific things that are occurring in
our world today?! No matter your political persuasion,
no one can like world hunger and starvation, wife and
child abuse, animal cruelty nor the collection of isms
that exist. So, where do we go from here? Being a
Pollyanna doesn't address the horrors in our existence,
nor do we necessarily have the means at our fingertips
to address the world sorrows. Reality dictates that we
can't turn a blind eye to those serious hates heretofore
mentioned. I catch myself remembering a sweet little
ditty from childhood, "Brighten the corner where you
are." I think therein lies the answer. If we each commit
to those few and wondrous acts of daily kindness and
positivity, at least our own corners will be brighter.
And, we all have several corners we can decorate
with loveliness . . . let's do this!

so fearing the dark
the boogeyman is hatred
lets turn on the lights

11/19/18

I've been thinking . . . now there's an idea! No really,
I've been thinking about what it is to be happy. I've
read all the gurus, the articles, the how to's . . . but
not really sure that I'm any closer. The great masters
seem to think that striving for contentment is what
it's all about. The New Agers believe they have all the
answers. The masters of yesteryear have written
volumes on the subject, droning on and on, but me
thinks I need a synthesizer! And, not to forget the holy
books . . . the Bible, the Koran, the Talmud and others.
I can't help but think that each and every believe they
possess the answers, but bottom line, perhaps the truth
is that the answer lies within and that happiness is
actually different for all of us. I hark back to high school
when all the girls were making cute little 'Happiness is"
lists with drawings of hearts and tears throughout. But
alas, I'm not 15 anymore . . . so where do I go from here?
I do know, without a shadow of a doubt, that my children
make me happy! My friends turn my sorrows to joy and
brush away my tears. Teaching . . . WOW! Now, there's
something that has bought me joy untold. Now, I'm
thinking I need to synthesize! Maybe I'm overthinking
this a bit. Maybe happiness isn't in the grandiosity of the
cosmos, but rather in those little bits and pieces of every
day. It comes to me that I'd better be doing an about
face and change my way of thinking. I'm going to take a
peek in the corners of my mind and start making my own
mini-list, albeit sans the hearts and tears . . .

seeking happiness
children friends travels and kin
finding it within

11/18/18

My doc insists that I drink 8 - 10 glasses of water
a day . . . AND keep a water log, pun intended.
Frankly, I've never drunk so much in my life; me
thinks I'm nigh onto dead in the water! I suppose
from a religious point of view, 'tis the water of life
and that has to mean a great deal. Alas, I'm like
a fish out of water there! At 69, and traversing a
steep flight of stairs, I would like to sleep through
the night, but if I have to choose between a healthy
liver and a fall down the rickety stairs, guess I'll
choose the former as me loves my red! I do have
to be careful so as not to get in hot water though.
My man says the 8 - 10 a day doesn't hold water
as everything we eat is water, but I must obey. I
actually haven't had a marg in many a moon as
our fave watering hole lost its liquor license . . .
Still, can't help but wonder if they count as water
intake! We've gone back there a couple of times
to test the waters, but I would have to admit
that even the best of Mexican food tastes even
more spectacular with a marg! Well, 'tis water
under the bridge. As retirees, we only eat out
about once a month, so come hell or high water,
we'll be finding a new place. Well, here's to you,
as I life my glass of H2O; just keeping my head
above water. And, just so you know, I'll be in
deep water if I don't win this bet that I can use
the damn word umpteen times in a paragraph!!!

punny mood today
me thinks tis thirst killing me
pray bring the drinks stat

11/17/18

I am renewed! What is it about spending quality
time with old friends that so heals the spirit?!
I am sorely tempted to name them goddesses!
Obviously, we most often pause in our busy lives
to think about friendship and hour our close buds
on February 14. Alas, I find I cannot wait that long.
Over the past couple of years, dealing with illness,
moving into the cabin (like trying to fit a five-gallon
bucket into an eight of a teaspoon!!!), I have had
the amazing opportunity to re-visit the true meaning
of friendship. We all love people, people we call friends,
yet sometimes life conspires to separate us for reasons
of no ill will; it simply is what it is. Life and living get
in the way and we are all dancing as fast as we can,
to quote Barbara Gordon. I have sorely missed those
with whom I have not been able to stay in touch and
thrill at the encounters of re-connection with others.
What gifts life does visit upon us . . . in the strangest
of manners, often unexpectedly! I find myself silently
swearing an oath to find a way to honor those I have
much loved during my lifetime. Friendship ROCKS!!!

enjoying friends
loves of different flavors
gifts of a lifetime

11/16/18 - Lady Hekate

I always look forward to November 16 as
it is the day in which the Greek Goddess,
Lady Hekate, is honored. As she is a major
figure n Greek mythology, I imagine most
of you are familiar with her on some level.
One of the salient features of this triple
goddess Hekate is, she is known as the dark
goddess of the three-way crossroads. When
I purchased my 120 year old cabin almost
seven years ago, it was obvious that it
actually sat on a three-way crossroads,
hence the most appropriate naming of the
cabin, The Lady Hekate. I find myself
enamored of the legends and lore of this
historical figure. She is most often depicted
in ancient Greek art as the bearer of twin
torches, lighting the way, as it were. She
also bears a ring of keys, yet another detail
for which she is known. Interestingly enough,
as we rehabbed the cabin, we found keys,
both archaic and modern, buried or strewn
about the property. With the vast, almost
encyclopedic knowledge known of Hekate,
it seems a bit rich to dedicate one paragraph
to her. Nonetheless, Lady Hekate ROCKS!!!

remembering you
mystical goddess of threes
pray stand in my dark

you at the crossroads
two torches lighting the way
pray shine on my path

lady hekate
triple goddess of the night
pray bring me your keys

11/15/18

I'm running behind, a place where we all have been.
It not only affects your sense of accomplishment,
but somehow it establishes itself in such a manner
that it becomes sort of a permanent state. I'm not
certain, exactly, how this happens. I suppose some
of us are list makers along with checking off and/or
crossing off. Others probably have some kind of
fluctuating list in their heads that they work with.
On a professional level, bosses demand . . . but we
are no different on the personal level. As adults, we
come to expect that each day we accomplish a given
number of tasks that bring us nearer to our goals,
whatever those may be. I find I don't have an answer.
Does dismissing the list help? Short term goals? Long
term goals? Saunter through life as it comes to you?
Or, is there a reasonable way to confront our needs,
our responsibilities, map out a general plan and simply
do each day what you can? My dad used to quote the
old adage, "The hurrier I go, the behinder I get"!
Me thinks I need a vision, a visit from the gods, some
instruction please! One way or another, it's on my list
 . . . let's see if I get a visitation!

expecting to find
a genie in a bottle
need a miracle

11/14/18

When I was taking my degree in Religion and
Philosophy, I remember studying the *11 great
religions of the world. I would have to admit
that only five of the eleven are likely household
words today. And, although that was about 100
years ago, alright, 45 . . . according to my research
the list remains virtually the same. I find it vastly
interesting that a subject, namely religion, could
be so divisive. And, as I understood it, Paganism
wa the oldest religion in the world and it wasn't
even on the list. So, what does all of this mean?
And where do we go from here? I think actually,
that we probably tend to form our own belief
systems depending on a number of factors such
as place of birth, familial ties, personal interests
and choices. And, as we are each such different
peoples, why shouldn't it be thus? I would hope
that one day, religion will be seen as a personal
choice along with where you choose to live, the
language you speak and how you like to dress.
God only knows, or should I say, the gods only
know, if and when that miracle could happen.

of the gods i sing
mighty wonders to behold
to believe or not

*Christianity
Islam
Hinduism
Buddhism
Sikhism
Judaism
Bahaism
Confucianism
Jainism
Shintoism
Zoroastraianism

11/13/18

In a world of fake, what comprises real?
Who are we? We who enjoy a good novel,
many a fine movie, make up to cover the
blemishes, push up bras, slenderizing girdles,
and fast cars as we use our crutches and
walkers . . . So, who are we in reality? It's
a hard call to pull off real in today's world.
We face each day with a torrent of ads,
all of which are about helping us to lose
weight, look prettier, gain popularity,
enhance muscle, and sell our souls to the
highest bidder. I'm not saying that the
fictitious has no place in our lives, I would
simply prefer that the non-fiction were the
meat and potatoes and the fiction the dessert.
Bottom line . . . who do I want to be when
I grow up? Do I have the courage to strive
for real? Can I leave popular fashion behind
and dress for comfort? Am I up to reading
literature over movies every night? Can I
give comfort over platitudes? Will I ever be
the real me and give up on the fictitious?
Just point me in the right direction and tell
me where I can sign up . . .

longing for real
so tired of fairy tales
courage to be me

11/12/18

I appreciate all the thought and research that
went into the political postings in the past few
months. There were those that took a lot of
trouble over their choices, looked into the
truth or error of each one and considered the
sensibilities of others. Once the election took
place, I mistakenly thought there would be a
bit of a break from posts such as these. I've
come to the conclusion that there are those
who are simply political animals, as it were,
and they are deeply interested in the topic
and wish to keep us informed. In all my years,
I don't think I ever really considered the
position of a political personality vs. an
apolitical one. Now it is much clearer to me.
I much honor each person's right for their
own belief system, their political persuasion
and their right to free speech. And, I even
appreciate in myself the learning curve that
has occurred during this past political period.
Still, I come to the conclusion that each of us
remain basically who we are, unpersuaded of
different opinions and views. Why then, is it
so important to speak out if we indeed do not
change? Me thinks it harks back, once again,
to the individual rights this country provides
us . . . and that is both priceless and amazing!

who am i today
appreciating freedoms
believing thusly

11/11/18

Of late, I've been contemplating the differences
between existing and actually living. It is indeed
something, to come to the end of your life and
question yourself if you have actually lived or if
you've solely given in to existing. Thank the gods
that we each have lists of wondrous and glorious
moments in which we actually lived, putting our
lives on the line for a given experience . . . but
perhaps the question really refers to, What is our
usual? D we live vicariously through the media?
The television? Our fave movies? The odd show?
Or, do we actually get out there and do the hike,
try out the snowboard, ski the slopes, travel and
see the world? Do we possess stories to tell or
do they belong to our heroes? Can se tell tales
out of school, or are they those of our sheroes?
Perhaps, in our elder years, we may be tempted
to hang up our skates, but I keep seeing photos
and stories of these amazing women in their 90's
still dancing, still hiking, still LIVING! Me thinks
'tis time to assess our position and get the hell
out of Dodge!

pray give me courage
to act out my own crazy
still craving real life

11/10/18

Yesterday, my man invited me to a Western Fest
of Wanted Dead or Alive.  I've always enjoyed his
Westerns although they might not be my usual
first choice of genre. I can't help but wonder, what
it is about Westerns that tug at us? Is it a secret
longing for the past? Do they fascinate us when
we see the changes, the differences, between
then and now? Perhaps, we are drawn to the
fashions of yesteryear. Or maybe, it's the quickly
settled justice that seems to prevail 'mongst the
villains of yore. The marshal as hero or even the
clear differences between the good buys and the
bad guys that  make for good storytelling. For me,
I appreciate the reminder . . . good ultimately
triumphs over evil; the good guys always win.
Looking at the fact that I've chosen to upend my
entire life, move into a 120 year old cabin, decorate
it solely with familial antiques and forego most
conveniences, I have to wonder if I'm not somehow
trying to re-birth myself into a past long forgotten?!
Me things you best doff the hat when next greeting
me and please don't mind my side holster . . .

tis rebirthing me
in order to find myself
process most painful

11/09/18

I find the end-of-year holidays fascinating;
Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas,
each in their designated month. We all love
our holidays, our celebrations and I imagine
we each have a fave. For me it's Halloween,
known in my vernacular as Samhain. I begin
gathering my Halloween decor throughout
September, hardly able to wait until October
arrives to begin decorating. And here we are
sandwiched between a late desertion of trick
or treat and the early arrival of x-mas sox.
Poor Thanksgiving barely stands a chance.
I hear complaints about the stores bringing
in Christmas decor even before Halloween
arrives, but that's business at its best. It has
occurred to me that it's time to get even III
So, I've decided NOT to take down Halloween
until the night before Christmas. Should you
come to the cabin for a visit, expect to find
Jack-o-lanterns rather than pumpkin pies,
skeletons instead of Saint Nick and black and
orange candles, not red and green. Long live
Halloween!

a true confusion
thinking sleigh bells and presents
tis ever hallows

11/08/19

Got mail? I received an actual card in the mail
yesterday. I simply held it in my hands for a few
moments before opening it. It's something, you
know, a real card in this day and age. I've been
sending e-cards for a couple of years now. Has
something to do with me being able to program
a whole month of cards into the computer on the
first day of the month and that way, I don't forget
anyone's birthday. Rather quick and dirty for thank
you cards as well. So, finally, I open the card . . .
it's not an everyday thing. Frankly, I was cherishing
the feel of it in my hands. Thick paper, that lovely
new paper scent, and then a personal missive. I
was quite moved . . . and then, onto the refrigerator
it went. Now, I can see it every time I walk by! I
thought maybe I should discard a couple of others
I had on the fridge, but when it came down to it,
no could do! Love the cards! Sooooo, I think I'm
inspired; don't be surprised if you get a card from
me in the next day or two!

me thinks real matters
something i had forgotten
remembering now

11/07/18

Like the caveman of yesteryear, I have had to
come to the conclusion that fire is pure magic!
I can be upset beyond reason and if I sit by the
fire awhile, everything comes into perspective.
Sometimes, I'm feeling excited and overjoyed,
(a good place to be right?!) and the fire is
rather the icing on the cake. On the occasion
when I am overwhelmed with grief, 'tis only
the fire that can soothe and comfort me. So,
what's my excuse this time? Not that one needs
an excuse to light the fire, but my man has
mentioned something about me using up all the
firewood before winter proper . . . this time I'm
lighting the fire in joy, pure unadulterated joy!
I get to spend the evening with my bestie who
lives out of town and as we talk the night away,
the fire enhances the bliss I feel, simply warming
the cockles of my soul . . .

magic of the night
burns at the seat of my soul
the glory of fire

11/06/18 - Election Day

Today is just another day, right?! Wrong! I can't
even begin to imagine how nervous we all are,
how concerned . . . sending our pleas into the
universe and hoping for the best. The thing we
should probably all remember is that, no matter
what happens, there will be those who won and
those who lost, those who are triumphant and
those who are drowning in sorrow. I have not
the wisdom to know how long it will take for our
country to heal after an election. I know not if
the winners can take the high road and be kind
or if they will stoop to rubbing noses in it. Pray
that along with whatever happens in the next
few hours, we can all do a bit of growing up. I
know that I certainly need to grow; pray tell!

standing on the bring
somewhere between hope and fear
pray i be wiser

11/05/18

I can't help but wonder if a trip down memory lane
constitutes its own version of time travel?! Several
of my old students provided me with my own ticket
yesterday. This had to be one of the most amazing
experiences I've ever had. To have them show up
together, see them as adults, responsible citizens,
loving spouses and parents, with a glass of wine in
hand, no less. I found myself being much moved by
these young women who prepared such a bountiful
banquet, right down to the essentials so I wouldn't
have to wash dishes afterwards. Fancy desserts and
a bouquet of lovely flowers topped it all off.
Absolutely best of all, of course, was visiting with
them, listening to their hopes and dreams, observing
their obvious friendship, and love for their families.
I simply feel deeply honored to know them. Harking
back, I thank the gods that I was given the opportunity
to be a teacher. I truly believe there is no greater
privilege than the sharing in the lives and learning
with our young people. What a gift! One of my
students made the remark that the bottom line, the
essence, is whether you love your work or not. I
would have to agree although I don't recall thinking
in those terms exactly. This I know; I loved teaching,
I adored my students . . . what a privilege to serve.

a ticket to ride
a trip down memory lane
hold onto your hats

11/04/18

I wonder, have we always experienced so
much sorrow? I imagine the answer would
have to be, yes! It seems each generation
has known war, hunger, lack of hearth and
home, a need of warmth, a cry for help.
Hark back to the slogans . . . Think positive!
Be happy! Yet, obviously, there are certain
needs that have to be met in order for said
slogans to come to fruition. And as we are
living today midst dire questions such as,
Who do we vote for? What do we do with the
broken families at the border? How do we
help and/or address the needs of the caravan?
Me thinks these issues have little or nothing
to do with our political leanings and more to
do with our own sense of right and wrong. I
certainly don't have the answers, so why
bring up these issues at all? Again, it occurs
to me that I may not be of much help to all
the ongoing problems that surround us. There
is a limit to the donations I can make or the
food I can gift . . . but, if each of us commit
to helping as many as we can, those nearest
us, the world will ultimately be a better place.
Just think about it . . . again with the concentric
circles . . . it all starts with ME, with YOU with
US, and as each of us reaches out a helping hand,
the ripple effect will have some kind of positive
effect. Let's each DO our part. Let's each HELP
someone near us. Let's each MAKE something
good happen and surely our gifts will keep on
giving.

there must be a way
finding myself at a loss
i so long to help

11/03/18

We are each born with a broad variety of cultures
to our credit column . . . albeit our racial heritage
such as Jewish, English, German, Asian, African.
Add in our wondrous paint palette . . . red, yellow,
black, white . . . our fun features . . . tall, short,
fat, thin . . . our personality traits . . . gregarious,
private, quiet, loud, interesting, dull, fun, boring . . .
and we have a myriad of amazing souls on this
planet that seem bound and determined NOT to
get along. I like to think that in the nigh onto 100
years I've been on this planet that things have
improved. Yet, it occurs to me that the only thing
that has changed is the costume in which we
present our own personal 'isms'. Are there truly
any answers? Is there anything really that we can
actually do? Perhaps the old cliche that everything
begins with ME, is right. From there, we make the
effort to make things right within our familial circle.
Choose our friends wisely and carefully . . . and
as each and everyone of us continues on with our
own circles, GOOD will grow. Right will survive.
CORRECT will enhance and perhaps HONOR will
win the day. Start we ME; start with YOU; let's
become US.

exhausted from hate
striving as fast as i can
may peace win the day

11/02/18 - All Souls Day

Thank the gods it's time to make Mole again.
Not that it's ever not Mole Season, but I tend
to like to make it around Tamale Season. I was
rather beyond fortunate that my in-laws swept
me away at the tender age of 18 and spent three
days teaching me to make mole. The women nigh
onto sang and danced their stories, making me one
of the family. Before the mole making began, I had
to promise that I would never share the secret
familial recipe with anyone other than my daughters.
In this world of sibling equality, I've included my sons,
obviously. This old family recipe has right around 100
ingredients; it takes weeks just to amass them. Today,
I'll stem and seed the chile pods and put them on the
boil. I don't even want to talk about all the grinding
and straining that comes later. Through the weeks,
we've all been collecting leftover wine to add to the
mix, if there even is such an animal. Bits and pieces
of chocolate need to be melted (and tasted) as one of
the most fun ingredients. Spices only to be found in
Southern Mexico, much cherished and held close to
the heart must be organized. Ripened bananas . . .
better stop before I tip my hand. These wonderful,
magical ingredients coming together in a three-day
cultural journey of memories, both sorrowful and
joyful, will soon be served over scrumptious chicken,
black beans and yellow rice . . . thus ending in joy
our three days of mourning and remembrance of
our loved ones long lost.

break bread together
sharing both joy and sorrow
remembering you

11/01/18 - Día de los Inocentes

Despierto el día de hoy recordando que es

el Día de los Inocentes. Simplemente la idea

de habernos perdido a tantos niños el la historia

nuestra es suficiente para dejar a uno atónito.

Me imagino que entre los pesares humanos, no

hay alguno que pudiera doler tanto como la

pérdida de un niño. Ojalá tuviéramos los medios,

la inteligencia, el don de Dios, para cuidar a

nuestros hijos de modo que jamás perdiéramos

uno sólo. En éste, el Día de los Inocentes, quiero

también recordar a los padres porque ellos son

los que se queden aquí, tratándose de enfrentar

cada día sin poder ver la carita de su hijo, su

hija . . . sin ganas de vivir pero teniéndose que 

seguir adelante por el resto de la familia, para

proveer para sus necesidades. Pienso en la madre

que se encuentra con los brazos vacíos, los pechos

llenos sin podérsele amamantar a su pequeño. Su

corazón destrozado . . .  valientemente sigue 

poniendo pan a la mesa, lavando la ropa, llorando

a mares cuando se encuentra una prenda de su

hijo ya descansando en paz. Nunca nos hemos

engañado con la idea que la vida es fácil, pero para

los que hayan perdido a un bebé, un niño, la vida

se presenta como la carga más pesado del mundo.

Recordémosles en nuestras plegarías porque ellos

son los verdaderos santos en este arduo camino

sin luz alguna.

luz de mi vida

en dónde te encuentras 

extrañándote