01/26/2021

I have to smile, nay snicker, at 

all the different tastes we have 

in entertainment . . .

I've been pondering types of flicks

and series of all sorts in which we 

indulge ourselves. I have friends 

who much enjoy opera, others who 

like musicals, and yet others who 

even indulge in soaps. What I have

never understood is the attraction 

to stand up comedy . . . and I don't

care a whole lot for comedy per se.

But, oh do I love me some murder 

mysteries and detective shows!!!

The only person I feel sorry for is

my guy who often has to watch

them with me. I'm not even sure

if he likes them, and I am afraid 

to ask!

I should be up front that I really

have no interest in the murders,

only the detection process! That,

I love. I used to enjoy Columbo

as the murder took place in the 

first few minutes and then the 

next two hours were pure process.

Strangely enough, I can't deal

with anything dark. I don't need

my viewing to be as light as

Murder She Wrote, but give me

some NCIS or Magnum P.I. and

I'm a happy camper.

So, please don't get murdered!

You'll never be certain whether

I'm devastated by your loss or

just plain interested in the

intricacies of your passing!

Yikes! I so fear God is going to 

get me for this!!!

between you and me

so enjoy me some murder

dont tell anyone

01/25/2021 - SPIRIT

I find myself thinking of the element 

of Spirit . . . 

I know we all have different beliefs, 

but having said that, I do think that 

Spirit resides within each of us. And,

I imagine, Spirit has many a face!

For some, Spirit represents God in 

the heart, a loving Christian God, a

conscience and protector, an entire

belief system.

For others, Spirit is that personal

center of feelings; joy, angst, sorrow, 

elation . . . for anything from the joy

at the birth of a child, to the sorrow

that the fave team has lost a game.

For me, Spirit is an element in the

center of the great ALL . . . The 

center of my being . . . of my belief 

system. It's the center of the world, 

the center of the elements.

Spirit is a guest in our own personal

time and space, a gift granted by the 

Universe, the gods, if you will. We

must be ever mindful of Spirit, what

ever this means to each of us. For

once it expires from our souls, so do

we . . .

Thank God for Spirit within . . .

such joy in spirit

a gift from god for within

spirit my best friend

01/24/2021

Rebellion is when you look society in

the face and say, I understand who you

want me to be, but instead, I will show

you who I actually am.

wildwomansisterhood

Not quite certain when I became so

rebellious . . . I was a family child, bent

on helping out with my special brother.

Yet, I do know I was allowed to speak

my mind and have my own opinions.

I am beyond grateful to my parents for

this amazing gift.

My rebellious nature certainly helped

me in my teaching. It allowed me to

accept my students and challenge their

minds to different ways of thinking. 

Not so sure how my administrators 

felt about that!

Still, I have to believe that there is a

right way and a wrong way of doing

things, no matter how rebellious! Just

because one is different, unusual,

eccentric, this doesn't give the right 

to be unkind, hurtful, or thoughtless.

I realize I will ever be an eccentric

and a rebel. Still, I wish to always 

strive to understand the other side 

of the equation. I want to listen to

alternative thought and opinion. I

long to understand different ways

of looking at things and thinking

differently!

Pray I go to my grave kicking up

the dust under my feet . . .

behave yourself girl

just who do you think you are

longing to be me

01/23/2021

Today, we escaped the cabin.  It's been 

a long time since we've been able to run 

away . . .

We met up with friends we haven't seen

in three months due to Covid. I swear, I

could hardly keep from hugging the hell

out of them.  I behaved myself as should 

be, but it was difficult.

It was such a strange meet up . . . a room

of sorts, enclosed in plexiglass with heat

for comfort. And speaking of comfort,

it wasn't actually very comfortable, but

it was a palace in my heart.

Sharing painful stories of this killer plague, 

joy and tears, thankful beyond belief. I

truly felt emotionally exhausted by the 

time we parted. Me thinks there needs be

a way for me to show my gratitude to

the universe!

Make no mistake, I'm thinking. I'm

thinking . . .

a happy ending

alas never expected

ever so grateful

01/22/2021

I love that I grew up in a family

of political differences. Mom a

Republican, Dad an Independent,

and I am a Democrat. 

We used to sit at the kitchen table;

discuss different political agendas,

points of view, the pros and cons.

of any given topic.

We never, ever fought. We never

raised our voices or offended each

other. Even today, my own children

differ from me and each other in 

political persuasions. My cousins 

belong to different parties, as do my 

friends . . .

Perhaps religion could explain it

better. Very few of us belong to the 

same church or hold the same beliefs. 

This seems to make no difference to 

any of us, so why should our political

persuasions?!

Pray, let us accept each other as we

are. Life is short, oh so short . . .

somethings similar

so many differences

makes life compelling

01/21/2021

I would have to admit to finding myself

somewhat stir crazy . . .

We've been in quasi lockdown for nigh

onto a year. I'm tired of house arrest. 

I'm missing my friends, to say nothing 

of my own children!

I have gotten a kick out of writing cards 

and letters, something I came up with 

whilst missing my people. We've enjoyed

the odd ride and a very occasional seeing

the children with masks on and social

distancing.

According to the newscasters, this year  

has been one of increased pregnancies, 

family feuds and divorces . . . Frankly,

I'm beyond thrilled that my guy and  

I get along so well, enjoy each other's 

company and are old enough to be 

satisfied with curtailed activities.

Hell, at this point, I might even settle

for a haircut as Phyllis Diller and I

are nigh onto looking like long lost 

twins . . . but I swear, somebody had

better get me the hell out of Dodge

pretty damn soon!!! 

claustrophobia 

emotions running amok 

color me locked up

01/20/2021

There's always a glimmer

in those

who have been

through the dark.

~Atticus

I find myself a bit awestruck of the darkness

Winter brings to the table. I don't see that

awe as particularly positive or negative. It

simply overwhelms the soul.

We've all had glorious experiences in the

dark . . . think back to bonfires on camping

trips, laying out under the stars on a summer

night, trick or treating on an October eve.

On the other side of dark . . . alone in the

dark, dark night of the soul, the dark side

of forever, in the dark about reality.

Interesting, I can enjoy the dark in Summer,

but Winter's dark brings me to death's door.

Alas, it's a dark I seem unable to overcome.

I am so negatively enthralled by the dark, I

can barely cope. 

I've come to know that there are those who

actually prefer the dark. And, although I'm

a lunar soul myself, I have a hard time

understanding this. I do appreciate that

we're all different, but I will keep praying

for Spring's soon return . . .

loving me some light

pray come keep me company

so afraid of dark

01/19/2021

In admiration . . .

Some have had life's curve balls thrown

at them and still find the courage to

soldier on.

Didn't we all grow up with the Cinderella

story?! She and her prince supposedly 

living happily ever after?!

I look at the families with special children,

maladies such as blindness, heart issues,

disease. I am at the feet of these mothers

and fathers who fight to make every day

as normal as possible for their children.

I much admire those school districts that

provide special teachers, classrooms and

curricula. I do wish more funds were

available to make them even better.

Just look at some of the young people

going into Special Education as a life

career. Their single thought is to serve.

When I'm feeling down and out, all I

have to do is look around and realize

there is still so much good in the world.

Longing to be part of that goodness,

decency and kindness . . .

look on the bright side

wise advice from my father

living in the light

01/18/2021

What's to be said about an afternoon

of pleasure,  of pure bliss?!

My guy came up with the sweet idea

of giving ourselves a day by the fire.

We like to light candles and listen to

music while enjoying the beauty and

warmth.

I had just seen my son's CDs on the

shelf and asked my man if he wanted

to listen to them. What followed was

an afternoon of absolute perfection!

I can hardly explain . . . pride being

the mom, elation at the beauty of

the singing, the memories evoked 

by the beloved Mexican songs . . .

memories of yesteryear!

I'll admit to feeling nostalgic, even

sad. I wanted to sob for all that I

was missing. Joy and sorrow . . .

I wish I could preserve each and

every moment of the day . . .

the gift of music

only missing wine and song

memories of mine

01/17/2021

A dear friend of mine gifted me an

old time type stereo for my birthday.

I've enjoyed it from the off . . . but

sitting in front of the fire during

winter and listening to my faves is

a real treat.

Alas at my age, I tend to like the old

timey kinds of music. My favorite

Western singer is Willie Nelson. So

LOVE him! Waylon Jennings is a

close second.

In the romantic realm, no one can

compare to Englebert Humperdinck!

I worship at his feet. Cat Stevens, nee

Yusuf Islam will always be an idol.

Harking back to yesteryear, I recall

adoring Marty Robbins, and Andy 

Williams. Sooooo, kinda wondering

if I'll ever wake up to the modern

groove and like some of the new guys.

Does enjoying Andrea Bocelli count?

He's rather beyond phenomenal! Still,

rockin' it to Willie Nelson!!!

hey mister crooner 

pray sing me a song or two

love me some music

p.s. Note I didn't even mention

Van Morrison!

01/16/2021 - FIRE

Sometimes, we have to go down in

flames to feel the burn, to know the

fire, to be the ash, and then come back

to life in the smoke that rises.

~Stacie Martin

What is it about the magic of fire that

touches the soul? It so moves me . . .

I was lucky enough to grow up with

a fireplace as daddy was a mason. He

built one for me in Mexico as well.

When I was upset, ill, or spent, fire

was the all time remedy.

The adages that fire has inspired . . .

fire in her eyes, fire in his soul,

a fire in the hearts of man, a baptism

of fire, fire and brimstone, fire away!

What is it about fire that it bleeds

into the very essence of language?

Me thinks it has something to do

with the power of fire. It wends its

way from the burning fields into the

very heart of the matter . . . all that

which matters to us, that calls to us.

I too have been much moved by fire.

I have been on fire for teaching. Fire

runs through my veins, hot to the touch

for those that I love. I feel the fire in my

heart should anyone touch my children.

I honor fire, its meanings, its ferocity;

I raise my glass in absolute awe . . .

let fire touch your soul

may its love burn ardently 

leaving sacred paths

01/15/2021

I get such a kick out of the gifts that 

retirement brings . . .

It's 2:30 in the morning and my guy 

and I are watching a flick together. 

We had ice cream for breakfast and 

we each ate a different lunch. Then 

a nap from 7:00 p.m. until 1:30 in 

the morning.  What fun playing with 

the clock that way.

We take a drive and stash a picnic 

in the back seat. Lunch can be at 

11:00 in the morning or 3:00 in the 

afternoon. Prior to the plague, we

could visit our children any day of 

the week. And not to forget the odd

pub!

You know, one spends an entire 

lifetime on a schedule . . . It's ever 

so freeing not to have one as well

as not having to answer to anyone.

What does bother me a tad is the

whole waking up at 4:30 in the

morning after I've played all day.

Guess you can't teach for 41 years

getting up every day at o'dark thirty

and expect to magically be able to

sleep in once retired . . .

Maybe the answer would be to go

to bed at 4:30 in the morning rather

than getting up then . . .

so love me some weird

me thinks its time to be good

lets call it a day

01/14/2021

Remembering when . . .

Once upon a time, I was a young, healthy,

slender runner . . . teacher and world traveler,

mother of many and living life to the fullest.

Now, I'm an elder, with the usual ills that

accompany one's journey. I walk rather than

run. My somewhat slender body is filled out.

I only travel the state and on a good day, a

state away. I am mother of only a few. I am

still teaching, but classes of a more spiritual

nature. And although my life is small by

comparison to yesteryear, it is still full, and

for this I am ever grateful!

It's interesting how we are encouraged to

live in the now, never look back and to get

on with life. But I find as one ages, there is

much value in looking back, albeit sorrows

'mongst the joys.

I love looking back at my children of then

and seeing them today in the now. I enjoy

hearing from students of yore, experiencing

their journeys as told by them and honoring

their successes. What fun to tell tales out of

school with girlfriends over a glass or two.

Here's to us, weathering the sorrows and 

reveling in the joys that life dishes out!

strange rememberings

utterly mystifying 

pray forgive myself