El 30 de Abril - Día del Niño . . .

Una de las muchísimas cosas que he
adorado de mi querido México, es la
manera en que se celebra a los nenes.
Ni sé, si así se hace en otros países,
pero hoy, celebramos a los nuestros.
Bien recuerdo el nacimiento de los
míos, aunque supongo que no se les
puede considerar niños. Igualmente
el de mis nietos, quienes ya sirven en
las fuerzas armadas de EEUU. Muy sin
embargo, hoy quiero recordar a aquellos
niños quienes han sido separados de
sus padres por problemas políticos. He
de pensar en ellos paulatinamente día
tras día; mando rezos estilo postdata
al cielo centenares de veces. Pregunto,
Qué será de ellos? Podrán crecer en
alguna parte, con cualquier ápice de
normalidad? Se les dará el don del
olvido? Tendrá Diosito y los ángeles
tiempo y manera de cuidarles?"
Recordémosles en nuestros rezos y
plegarias. Roguémosle a las alturas
que se les cuide lo mejor posible y
nunca olvidémosles jamás . . .

agobiada
más allá del más allá
tristeza mata

04/29/19

You are no longer welcome here! You
spent the entire winter with us, all two
feet of you, and it's time you left! This
coming back again and again, well after
Spring has been announced, is not only
cursi, but in poor taste as well. Go home!
Come back next year, but NOT NOW!
This whole adage of, "Let it snow!" is
overrated! I'm tired of it!

tired of winter
when will spring truly arrive
prithee snow no more

04/28/19

Sleepless in Seattle has nothing on me!
My guy has taken a weekend hiatus to
spend with his family as well as play 2nd
mechanic. I find it both interesting and
amusing how when one is used to sleeping
with that one special person, and for what
ever reason they are not there, sleep isn't
either. We humans are a strange lot. I
imagine we invoke some serious chuckles
in the gods . . . bet I sleep well tonight!

finding myself spent
current price of solitude
banking my request

04/27/19

Reconnection is such an amazing gift.
You may expect it; you may anticipate
it, but nothing prepares you for the
overwhelming glory of it. And then
you wonder . . . Wonder why we didn't
stay in touch, write or call? Wonder if
we even realized how much we meant
to each other? Wonder if we would have
been this close without the separation?
We have all heard the adage that life
gives us what we need, when we need it.
Actually, there have been times when I
wish life had paid a tad more attention!
Maybe life mets out a crossroads to take
us on our different, necessary paths, and
then, when you least expect it, a renewal
is gifted . . .

pondering friendship
discernment not required
grateful for the don

04/26/19

I find the twists and turns of friendship
most fascinating. It's amazing, in and
of itself, how we fragile, frail, fucked up
human beings can love so well. I also find
intriguing, the different things that move
us. Add to that, the nigh onto impossibility
of those chance encounters that lead us
to friendship, and you might just have the
definition of . . . a miracle! I imagine most
of us give some thought to this subject
somewhere around Valentine's Day. I'm
fast coming to the conclusion that we'd
do well to contemplate this gift every day
of our lives. Friendship should never be
taken for granted and I would reiterate
that making friends with our children and
family is vastly important. Let's think about
this, truly think about it! Let's ask the hard
questions. In this amazing gift that we are
oft times given, how can we be better worthy?

contemplating love
how to be more deserving
wowed beyond the pale

04/25/19

My favorite colors are black, dark black,
pitch black, pastel black, light black,
faded black. ~Unknown

I believe the phrase, "Black is beautiful!",
was coined by college students back in my
day. This was brought to mind a couple of
days ago when one of my friends came to
lunch. I remember meeting her a few years
ago, talking and laughing. A day or two later,
a gal asked me about the pretty black woman
I was talking to. It occurred to me then, that
I hadn't actually realized she was black. But,
I digress. Me thinks BLACK is the most, MOST
beautiful color in the entire universe. I love it
in people, book covers, clothing, undies . . .
not, that this should all be said in the same
breath. Anyone who knows me, knows that
I always dress in black. I do like to throw on
a shirt with some color in it, just to add a bit
of interest to the equation. Bottom line . . .

black is beautiful
color me black any day
tis my favorite

04/24/19

All in a day's work . . . rise and shine,
skip breakfast, a fight over fire, a friend
for lunch, sharing a glass of wine, catching
up, treasures ahoy, sitting by the coals,
sleep with abandon . . . what a gift!!!

all in a days work
dont want to do any more
ever so tired

04/23/19

I have two amazing memories of when I was
three turning four. I know the age because
shortly before I turned four, we moved and
Mrs. Barns was no longer our caregiver, as
we call this today. On this particularly day in
my memory, she was in the living room
ironing and listening to the radio; I sat on
the floor playing with my doll. The program
was an audio rendition of Romeo and Juliet,
reenacted with the different voices. To this
day, I have no idea why she allowed me to
listen; she must have thought I was too
young to capture the meaning. She could
also simply have been too enthralled to pay
attention, as was I. Obviously I was too
young to understand the concepts celebrated
in this enduring tragedy. Nonetheless, it made
an impression such that it has impacted me,
as well as my values, my entire life. I tend to
view suicide differently from others. I seem to
honor young love as witnessed in my classes,
lo these 40 years. And, above all else, a life-
long love affair with Shakespeare. I will ever
love the Bard!!!

in love with the bard
celebrating four fifty
wish i could be there

04/22/19 - Earth Day

Tread softly! All the earth is holy ground.
~Christina Rossetti

I imagine this day awakens different thoughts
and memories in each of us. I had only just
become of age when Earth Day was initiated;
a truly different era. Everyone likes to think
theirs to be the best and brightest and I'm no
exception. I fondly remember picnics every
weekend, rides through the mountains a couple
of times a month, nature photography and city
wide pick up trash days. I even remember fines
for littering being implemented. Best of all was
Gaylord Nelson initiating his Earth Day campaign.
At the time, I was more enamored with his name
than his cause. I mean really, Gaylord?! I was
a goner! And yet, here we are nearly 50 years
later, our cities are trashed and many reticent
to recycle. Me thinks 'tis a good day to remind
ourselves that Mama Earth R O C K S and it's up
to us to honor her in every possible way we can!

remembering you
mother ever in my heart
worship at your feet

Happy Earth Day, April 22, 1970

04/21/19 - Easter Sunday

Easter - Ostara . . . a refrain in my heart!
Which do we honor? Who do we honor?
When in doubt, do both?! I imagine this
would be difficult unless one were simply
celebrating without paying attention to
meaning. Same holiday, different belief
systems. Ostara is the Pagan Easter, as
my parents called it when I was young.
We weren't even allowed to participate in
Easter egg hunts as that would be tres-
passing on Pagan boundaries. Easter,
the Christian version of Ostara, is a fab
celebration, including such child-like joys
as the infamous Easter egg hunts, above
mentioned. Bottom line, both holidays
have wondrous messages. We all enjoy
them and I honor this growing policy of
mutual acceptance within our human tribes.

easter ostara
messages from yesteryear
how and why to choose

04/20/19

Three days of moon glory! Primarily known as
the PINK MOON, in the Native American world,
the Sprouting Grass Moon, the Egg Moon or the
Fish Moon. In my spiritual path, we use these
three days in wondrous healing meditations. The
day before the full moon (ascending), we meditate
on those things of a spiritual nature we would like
to add to our lives. On the actual day of the full
moon, we celebrate and honor the female, who
she is, what this means. The day after the full moon
(descending), we meditate on the things we need
to remove from our lives so that we might grow.
spiritually. In doing this, month after month, we
are kept mindful of our path, things that matter
and how better to achieve them. I not only like
and appreciate the significance, but I truly honor
all that orients me to the path and helps me grow.

oh lunar lady
pray remind me of my path
may i ever grow

04/19/29

Life isn't as serious as the mind
makes it out to be. ~Eckhart Tolle

A very clever lass thought to remind us
of this brilliant concept by Echart Tolle
this morning. I sooooo needed it! You
all know me, and know as well, that I
tend to overthink, overdo, overreact . . .
simply, over everything!!! I always
threaten to grow up and get over this
kind of shit, but somehow . . . it hasn't
happened yet! Do wish me well in
overcoming my malady!

cant live with over
somewhere over the rainbow
i am over it

04/18/19

Bella Dama, pray shine down on me.
I am undone by your sultry beauty.

At O'dark thirty this morn, I chanced
to peek at Lady Luna. I was wowed
beyond the pale. Truly, this was the
most stunning vista ever. The sky
melded hues of smoky blacks and blues
as the perfect backdrop to her majesty's
appearance. Branches in shadow laced
her shy face, ere she blush in pleasure.
The Earth stood still and silent. Before
such august beauty, I bowed my head
and wept.

luna más bella
lágrimas cayéndose
me arrodillo

04/17/19

Birthdays, per se, have the ability to invoke
thought. My bestie is here celebrating that
special 65th . . . we sat by the fire, had a tad
of red and simply walked down memory lane.
I can remember as a kid, sooooo wanting to
get older. I recall enjoying all of my birthdays.
Still, I will admit that 65 is somehow a turning
point. Perhaps, it has to do with that infamous
'age of retirement' thing. Maybe, the mind is
invaded with thoughts of travel, sleeping in,
not having to deal with the daily mundane
quite so much . . . to say nothing of the fact
that the kids are all grown up. So, here's to
wishing her well, happy upcoming memories
to be made, and . . . PRAY that she take me
along on her European trip . . .

memories most sweet
she being one of the best
tis blest that i am

04/16/19

Every year around March, when I'm
prepping all my tax docs, I swear to
myself that in the following months
I'm going to be ever so much more
careful with my filing. Got my taxes
filed, mostly everything in order, but
my new year's resolution didn't even
last two weeks! So, I pay my bills this
am and find that I hadn't even bothered
to write in the check numbers! Now, I
have to go through all the piles to get
them written in. I think I've proved
beyond a shadow of doubt, that people
mostly don't change . . . at least I don't
seem to; go figure!!! ~@#$%^&*()_+

old dogs and new tricks
seems to ring a bell somehow
oh well so not me

04/15/19

Not certain if I'm reinventing myself or what?!
Seems my Mac space is maxed out and I've
been encouraged to purchase additional. Not
even certain what that means other than the
fact that I have too many files saved and don't
particularly want to spend my wine money. Ha!
So, I've been deleting literally hundreds of files
since about 3:30 or so this morning. What an
interesting journey that has been! Memory lane,
notwithstanding, I find it fascinating to see my
life as revealed in docs rather than the usual
show and tell, as it were. Some of my tastes
and interests have changed, to say nothing of
the transition from full-time teacher to entirely
retired! I do regret some of the items deleted,
but mostly, I've gotten quite a kick out of a
look-see, a bit of memory, and simply letting
go. Maybe, there's a lesson in that . . . the
future awaits. Suppose my Mac will help with
memory loss? ~!@#$%^&*()_+

tripping with no map
science fiction at its best
techno virgin rocks

04/14/19

The betrayal of the best is hard to take and
not to be endured lightly! A recent incident
reminded me of how we all hate the breakdowns.
I can remember as a child, sitting in a cold car,
while daddy changed the tire or monkeyed with
the engine. Bless his heart!  would that we all
could afford brand new vehicles and that they
would actually go the distance. I pray I never
break down when I'm on my own! Wonder if
I'm too old to study mechanics? Not bloody
likely, I guess . . .

bowing to the gods
who are you what is your name
gods of ancient cars

04/13/19

No! NO!! N O ! ! ! I'm sooooo NOT having
this! Winter is OVER!! Is Mama so out to lunch
that she didn't get the missive?! ~@#$%^&*()_+
Well, she is the boss, o.k. QUEEN, after all, so
I guess I'll just have to grin and bear it. Still,
if any of you hear me complaining about the
heat this summer, I want you to give me a
swift kick in the nether regions! And, I do
know and understand that we need all the
moisture we can get . . . still . . .

so tired of snow
winter winter go away
dont come any day

04/12/19

The winds blow their own freshness into you,
and the storms their energy, while cares will
drop away from you like the leaves of autumn.
~John Muir

I'm not quite certain if I've only just reconnected
with the wind or only met it for the first time. In
this trip over the passes, both going and coming,
we've experienced wind as never before. It may
be a case of first time hauling a travel trailer
through the breezes from hell, but several friends
and family have commented on it as well. This in
turn, brings to mind all those souls who have
suffered the horrors of extreme weather through
the long winter months . . . flooding and fires,
hurricanes as well. Makes me realize in our little
trip, we truly experienced nothing of the kind.
Me thinks Mama Nature is faunching at the bit,
as it were . . .

prithee winds of strife
pray bring your sorrows no more
quaking in my boots

04/11/19

Blows me away that I am nigh onto 70 years
of age and it still matters to me, on some level,
what people think. I would imagine this is the
case with most people, but all of us admire
those who somehow manage to escape that
sense of need for personal and/or public
approval and acceptance. Interestingly enough,
I find that if we, ourselves, don't happen to
approve of a given person or faction, their
approval is neither sought after nor required.
Aren't we an amazing, interesting, entangled,
diverse, counterintuitive bunch . . . aren't we
just?!

growing up and growing old
striving for the hang of it
alls right with the world

04/10/19

Adventures ahoy . . . fun trip, despite the winds.
Still, a very interesting experience. I find myself
'twixt and 'tween the whole, "There's no place
like home." and "Home is where the heart is."
Our first adventure in the travel trailer, trying
everything on for size, as it were. Realizing  some
things work better than others, those pleasant
surprises of small successes, the anticipation of
joys to come. Where shall we go next . . . and . . .
do I actually have the shekels for that fab idea?!

such machinations
so longing for adventure
retirement rocks

04/09/19

Emergency! Emergency!! Everybody off the street!!!
We're so excited . . . our first trip with Lady Salem.
We're off to the great metropolis, over the hills and
through the woods. We're going to give our sendoff
and blessings to our Marine grandson on the way to
his MOS Station. We wish him well and hope to be
honored by visits in the future. As we've been gifted
by trips from our Army grandson, I imagine it will be
similar. I pray the gods protect him; here's wishing
him well.

adios farewell
caught betwixt pride and sadness
prays for your safety

04/08/19

Honey, I'm home . . . with travel trailer in tow.
Me thinks we're in for some pretty fab experiences!
Right now, we've just returned from a shopping
spree of must haves. As soon as I've had breakfast,
I intend to load them on. My guy is working on a
special hitch; thanks Len, for helping out with that.
Actually, you should be here helping with putting
it on! Ha! So, I imagine this summer will be all
about experimenting. It will be quite interesting
learning the ropes, trying things on for size,
finding out what works and what doesn't. Does
anyone know who the gods of travel trailers are?

fun and games ahoy
here we come ready or not
been waiting so long

04/07/19

Glorious day of phenomenal reconnections! I was
fortunate to have found an old friend and fellow
teacher on Facebook. Such interesting connections
life offers. Who would have thought it . . . I imagine
part of growing up and growing older, is the whole
finding interesting people, making friends and
enjoying the resulting relationships. I so honor
these gifts that life doles out unexpectedly! Truly,
meeting people, and enjoying the ensuing sharings
that result, are one of life's marvelous gifts. I raise
my glass and toast life's capricious machinations!

unexpected gifts
friendships and reconnections
ever fortunate

04/06/19

2019 and three months under! Seems to me,
I've spent said three months reviewing and
prepping tax materials from '18. Add to that,
a proper look-see into finances in order to
give myself permission to buy a little travel
trailer. And, just when I was giving thanks that
I'm neither an accountant nor a bookkeeper,
(forget Tax Pro) I am assailed with the request
to go over two years medical history. I have
the ability to recognize important papers, but
also have the lousy habit of just throwing them
on the desk for several months. After all, isn't
that what tax prep is all about . . . getting your
files in order? Heaven forbid, if I didn't have to
do tax prep . . . I can't imagine six feet of papers
to deal with.

piles and piles
under attack by paper
revenge of the trees

04/05/19

Sitting by the fire; its warm glow enchanting!
Adding wood from time to time; hoping it lasts
all night. Romance is in the air and its name is
Salem. Yes, Salem! It's painted, by the company,
right on the side of the travel trailer! You'd think
we were enjoying the fire, the moment . . . but,
NO! We're making lists and checking them twice.
Santa can't compete; he doesn't stand a chance.
There is 'an already have' list. There is a 'to buy'
list. There is a '???' list. There's even a 'legal' list.
And, every now and then, when you least expect
it, I just jump up, run and get something, and say,
"Will this do?" And my guy gives the yay or nay?!
Who ever said planning your first road trip in a
new travel trailer wasn't romantic?!

new new new new new
a new kind of enchanting
a new lease on life

04/04/19

Scary biscuits! I've done it! I've bit the bullet!!
I've faced the dragon!!! I actually laid down a
hold it, a save the day, an I've done it, did it!!!
Me thinks I'm shaking as fast as I can and I am
NOT exaggerating!!! NO bullshit intended!
Today, I accessed my bit of savings, a 26 year
savings at $50.00 a month . . . and I'm buying
a little, single axel travel trailer . . . vacays for
the rest of my very limited life . . . WOW!!!
Dreams do come true . . . I sooooo pray there
are more than many!!!

this matters to me
may all my wishes come true
adventures ahoy

04/03/19

Today begins the dream . . . we are
off to peek at travel trailers, perhaps
even choose one! It's a tad scary; I
haven't had the opportunity to feel
properly retired before, as I was taking
care of mom for a few years. Then we
were moving into the cabin; been there
over a year now. Sooooo, time to do
something rather out there . . . exotic . . .
maybe even travel nearby, ha! Really?!
Can't help but wonder what this whole . . .
Transition Survival Training is?!

bring on the dreaming
magic carpet now awaits
nay no maps needed

04/02/19

Me thinks family means different things at
different times of our lives. My father was
one of three brothers, but none of them lived
in the same town. Dad's younger brother lived
only a couple of hours away. I can remember
getting so excited when we were going to see
my cousins. I secretly thought of the two girls
as my younger sisters and their older brother
was one of the great loves of my life. Dad's
other brother lived far, far away in the grand
metropolis of Denver. To me, that was as
magical as any Disneyland. Alas, the visits
there were few and far between. His girls,
somewhat older than me, were exotic. They
even knew how to turn cartwheels! Their
younger brother was a cutie and my Sammy
adored him. Now, lo these many years later,
we are still in different towns and places,
different lives and spaces . . . even some of us,
in never, never land. I find myself missing
them; still, they live in my heart and I wish
them well.

remembering mine
in a land far far away
they belong to me

04/01/19

Childhood friends of yesteryear . . . sweet,
poignant memories . . . not to pick and choose,
but to live and re-live daily. Indeed, I do have
many wondrous memories from my childhood.
Obviously, that doesn't mean there aren't some
difficult ones as well . . . life in a nutshell, isn't
it?! A glorious evening spent with a childhood
friend, one I much admire and care for, helps
remind me who I wish to be when I grow up.
I can remember thinking, lo these many years
ago, that I would be all grown up by now. Alas,
'tis not to be. I've come to believe this growing
up nonsense goes right through to the bitter end.
Sooooo, may I continue to grow, and pray I do
so well!

thinking and praying
guess planning doesn't cut it
who will i become