03/01/2023

SAD is winning this round;

not feeling like I'm going to 

make it . . .

I know, I understand, I get it;

the low temps, the threatening

snow and perhaps above all,

the dark! I simply can't take it

all in. It threatens, envelops,

punishes and I am no longer

all present and accounted for.

I hurt, I'm shaky, I can't even

really see properly. It is ever

so frightening to be so out of

it, that grandiose IT . . . naught 

is recognizable. The tears come

unbidden, solve nothing and I

don't want to be here anymore.

Ever so glad that hope springs

eternal, that tiny little gleam in

my present dark! Methinks my

fireplace is calling my name.

May actually save the day . . .

one can only hope . . .

 - - -

Seasonal Affective Disorder,

A mood disorder characterized by

severe depression that occurs at 

the same time every year. SAD

symptoms include depression,

fatigue and social withdrawal.

Treatment includes phototherapy,

talk therapy and medications.

02/28/2023

Been missing you of late . . .

you know, that young woman

you used to be!

That young college student, so

young she participated in a bra

burning march against the Viet

Nam war . . . caught, fined . . .

That incredibly young wife who

would have done anything and

everything to make things work.

So full of hope and expectations!

That young mother who would

have died for her children at any

given moment, but so ignorant

of all that was required . . .

That young teacher, so full of hope,

longing to save lives in the face

of each and every student to cross

her path . . .

And now, this olde woman, so 

full of dreams and memories of

yesteryear; how will she survive?

Who is she? Who has she become?

I do hope to get to know her . . .

to know this olde moi. I pray I am

not disappointed . . .

"I have traveled through

madness to find me."

~danny alexander

02/27/2023

"I'm a paradox. I want to be happy,

but I think of things that make me

sad. I'm lazy, yet I'm ambitious. I

don't like myself, but I also love 

who I am. I say I don't care, but I

really do. I crave attention, but

reject it when it comes my way. 

I'm a conflicted contradiction. If 

I can't figure myself out, there's no

way anyone else has." ~Unknown

Methinks there has never been a

better written statement re Libras.

Not sure even the author knows.

While I wouldn't admit to laziness

and I accept that modicum amount

of attention . . . that whole, "I'm a

conflicted contradiction," fits to a T.

In thinking about this, there's prob

naught wrong with contradictions.

Rather make life interesting, if you

ask me. Alas, we've been taught to

watch out for them and that's just 

wrong.

As a kid, I was reminded from time

to time that the C-word was a bad

thing. A positive pattern was to be

sought. Every and all needed to 

make sense. Still, I simply couldn't

help myself. And, I do treasure the

above words. They make it all right

somehow.

When my time comes, I want this

on my stone . . . 

"She was a most interesting 

contradiction . . . "

02/26/2023

"Throw away the idea that you

need to pause your life until you

are fully healed. This is just a 

different way of being attached to 

perfection. Real progress happens 

when you make better decisions in

the midst of living." ~yung pueblo

Not sure if it's moi, or we Libras

that continually await perfection

to set in so we can get on with life.

And then, I read Yung Pueblo.

Diego Pérez puts forth a mountain

of wisdom for one so young. And,

I'm listening, paying attention for

all I'm worth. That old phrase, 

"Out of the mouth of babes . . . "

comes to mind.

I am truly amazed at the different

venues where wisdom pops up.

The book you happen to be reading,

a sign post along the side of the road,

bits and pieces from the infamous 

FB, basically, everywhere you look.

I'm getting the idea that if one is

actually looking, wisdom can be

found anywhere and everywhere.

Sooooo long to pay attention and

learn . . .

 - - -

Diego Pérez is the writer behind the

pen name Yung Pueblo. The name

means young people. It serves to 

remind him of his of his Ecuadorian

roots, his experiences in activism,

and that the collective of humanity

is in the midst of important growth.

02/25/2023

"A person with a warrior's heart

can summon internal strength

seemingly out of nowhere and 

face their battles with outrageous

strength and resolve. It's not

simply an attitude or a decision.

It's a gift. It's who they are."

~Ted G

Methinks I have found in the 

words of Ted G, the person I 

wish to be when I grow up . . .

I know and honor those times 

in my life when internal strength

has been required, nay demanded,

of me. It seems you don't even

think about it 'til it's over. I'm not

even certain I could rise to the

occasion if I were allowed to

ponder it.

I imagine we all possess that

strength and resolve needed to

serve our children, families and

friends. Yet, there are those who

would say we must be whole 

ourselves in order to serve others. 

Great idea . . . still, methinks no

mother would ponder herself re

her own position before trying 

to save her own children.

One the things that touches me

are these marvelous pieces of

beauty and wisdom we can still

find in our world today. Alas,

we see so much sorrow, betrayal,

ugliness . . . I somehow need to

see beyond and contemplate the

beauty we also have.

Sooooo pray for personal growth!

May it be . . .

02/24/2023

"Maybe the desire to make

something beautiful is the

piece of God that is inside

each of us." ~Mary Oliver

I so enjoy Mary Oliver's

work. She reminds me the

grandeur of Mother Nature

outbids, outdoes, outshines 

each and every other sorrow 

of this world.

And yes, even winter and

her freezing snows are by 

far more glorious than all 

the nasties this world has 

to offer.

So today, when I venture

forth 'mongst these piles 

of snow, I will hold Mary 

Oliver close to my heart.

she sings of mother

and her nature to behold

bless her memory

 - - -

Mary Jane Oliver, American

poet who won the National

Book Award and Pulitzer Prize.

Her work is inspired by nature

stemming from her lifelong

passion for solitary walks in

the wild. 1935 - 2019

Wikipedia

02/23/2023

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr  ~!@#$%^&*()_+

Years and years to finally become

me, myself and I . . . the who I am,

as it were, and it only takes the gal

nigh onto an hour to lay me low!

But, I got even . . . went out and

ate three chocolate covered dough-

nuts. Got home and made brunch

type margs!

God in heaven, I'm supposed to

brush more than the usual three

times a day, floss, insert magic

brushes as well as poke and prod

with this god-awful instrument 

of torture.

I asked my doc if I might outlive

the denture scare . . . Did she re-

assure me? Did she wish me well?

Hell no! She answered . . .

     "I certainly hope so."

And not to forget, I have to return

in three months! Not sure what I'll

do to get even then. That might

require some serious planning and I

intend to really sin this time around! 

Wanna join moi? Send in your apps

with serious ideas attached! I may,

or may not, include you . . .

02/22/2023

Nervous as a cat on a hot tin 

roof this a.m. Nothing like an

early visit to the local dentist 

to rather set my fears afire!!!

I remember getting a kick out

of going as a kid. Perfect teeth

and the gift of a piece of candy

afterwards. You may appreciate

the irony.

Still, I suppose being naughty

for 70 plus years with eats and 

afters are finally taking their

toll.

My wish is to still be naughty

but not end up with dentures.

At my age, should be do-able!

I think if I survive the date with

the deadly doc, I may just take 

my guy out for breakfast. Although,

it may be snowing pretty heavily

by then.

Methinks someone should take

this winter Colorado weather to

the dentist and see how likable

it is! 

God help me . . . can't decide

which I hate more . . . winter

or the dentist . . . although, the

visit is an hour and winter lasts

more than a couple of months.

Easy pickin' . . .

02/21/2023

"Silence is loaded with answers."

~Unknown

This unexpected bit of wisdom

showed up on my doorstep this

early a.m. and set me a ponder . . .

I've been a bit of a chatty Patty

my entire life. I can remember

my parents taking the odd drive 

and daddy would tell me that I 

needed to be silent for half an 

hour. Obviously, I obeyed, but 

it nigh onto killed me.

I still enjoy . . . but perhaps,

conversing more than talking.

And, I'm daring to think I'm

even beginning to shut up from

time to time. Maybe someone

else would like to get a word

in edgewise?!

I find I actually like listening 

to others prattle. Maybe I learn 

something or maybe I don't. Still, 

it's interesting! I get a kick out of 

sussing out what things different 

people like to talk about.

There are weather only peeps. 

Some love to gossip. Others

offer the profound. These are my

faves. Again, if I listen, I learn.

I swear, I'm going to listen up . . .

Silence is indeed a gift! I might

even learn something!

02/20/2023

Oh my God! Pure ambrosia!

One of my daughters bought

me a French Press and taught

me how to use it. Okay girls,

just spread the guilt around!

I should have been drinking

this for years!

There's no mistake about it,

coffee in all its guises, has 

to be one of the greatest gifts

the gods ever granted mankind.

Having said that, bet you any-

thing 'twas the goddess that

invented the French Press.

I have three different kinds

of delectable manjares and

I'll be trying them all out in

this bit of a miracle; make 

no mistake!

I find it rather annoying that

I then mess it all up by adding

creamer; I somehow escape

perfection, alas!

Not sure even a midnight 

marg could compete with this!

Salud to one and all! 

02/19/2023

"You can take her out of the folk

tale and the forest, dress her up

and distract her with control, but

beauties who are taught to whisper

never stray far from the singing

sorcery screaming in their souls."

~Ann Marie Eleazer

'Twas my first encounter with the

written word this a.m. and I was

wowed beyond the pale; make no

mistake!

I pray there might be just a tiny

bit of a description of me in there

somewhere. Maybe not, but still,

it's who I want to be when I grow

up.

Remember when you were a child.

You'd thumb through the magick

of storybooks and long to find

yourself 'mongst the pages you

found there?! That feeling has

never left me. And, when I read

Ann Marie, I feel so bereft I could

break down and sob.

I am beyond grateful that I do live

in my own magickal kingdom, get

to share it with my wild ones and

see Mother Nature up close and

personal each and every day of my

life.

And, I do so love talking to my

dad. There are days I feel bereft

that I can no longer climb my

own mountains. Still, I can see

it and envision those many things

that go on there.

Ever, ever grateful . . .

Ann Marie Eleazer has always

considered herself a bit ancient,

haunted and otherworldy, who

enjoys enchanted flights through

the dark fairy tales and magical

places she's been drawn to since

childhood. Google Books

02/18/2023

"Winter is a wicked, haughty one,

she is. She gives us one last zinger 

of cold weather full of snow, just 

to say, 'I gotcha!' But then, the snow

melts and the world has water to feed

the rivers, the trees and all the people."

~Alice Sueltenfuss

Per usual, been having some naughty

thoughts. Has to do with waking up

to around 0 degrees with a tad more

snow on the ground. Okay, make that

10 inches one time and 13 the next.

I would think we'd all get tired of

hearing me bitch about the dark 

months. But this morning, my dear

dear friend up North, mailed me the

above quote . . . her own! It's such a

positive way to look at both winter

time and her snows.

Methinks I'll be reading this every

a.m. at the break of day in order to

get on the positive train. Indeed,

the gift of water is priceless and I

am grateful.

I'm also well-pleased that our pipes

have only frozen up twice so far.

My guy insulates them by wrapping

them in some new fangled gift of

the gods and presses a button. Seems

to really help.

Living in a 135 year old cabin has 

its deets, but I swear, he's sussed out 

most of them.

So here's moi, getting an entirely new

outlook on these cold, snow packed

months. If I lapse, pray call me on it.

I'll have it coming; make no mistake!

Now, just get out the hot chocolate and

Bailey's . . .

02/17/2023

"This busy, materialistic 

nonsense is not for me. I

belong in a witchy cabin

in the forest somewhere

w/my books, wild berries

and a pet fox." 

~Brooke Hampton

Seems, Brooke is talking

'bout me again! And yes,

I do have foxes, mapaches,

bob cats, the odd mountain

lion and bears as well! Not 

sure if its good or bad they

feel so comfortable here,

but they are not pets!

I particularly love it when

the deer and elk stroll thru.

Such beauty and grace. 

Once in a while, they sack

out in the back yard, take 

in some sun and luxuriate.

We could learn from them.

My little piece of heaven is

a great deal of work. Can't

even imagine the work my

guy goes through to provide

wood for the long winter

months. The pipes freeze,

the water is't potable, to say

naught of five min warm-ish,

often cold, showers. I'm not 

even going to talk 'bout doing 

the laundry.

Now, ask me if I'd live any-

where else?! Nooooo way

in hades! It's pure heaven here!

And here's a secret for you to

keep under your hat . . .

. . . Margs at the cabin taste

better than anywhere else in

the world!!! 

Salud . . .